Ana Michels
Fall 2022
“I wasn’t thinking about becoming a citizen, because I’m a Mexican citizen. But because of you two, I really needed to think about becoming one, because as an immigrant they’re gonna take me away from you.”
Every story has an inflection point. Leticia Abarca Michels’s was falling in love in Acapulco.
While working in human resources for Eli Lilly, Leticia decided to take a trip with friends for the weekend. Dancing at the Hard Rock Cafe, she met Jonathan Michels, an American who had been convinced by his friends to drive to Mexico from Southern California for Memorial Day weekend.
“I moved to the U.S. because I was in love, you know. I loved my husband, now and then. I was very very in love. We dated far-distance for like 2 years and some months and I met the family, he met my family. So, I moved here because I was in love. That’s it. And, then you two guys came, my two girls, and that was it. I moved here to be with Jon and to form a family with him.”
Her life in Mexico City prior to meeting Jon was comfortable. She speaks fondly of her upbringing, recounting tales of her father, Javier Abarca, who, unfortunately passed away when she was still quite young.
“I was a very good child. Too good I think. My relationship was very close to my dad. My mom was more like a disciplinary woman. My dad was more like a, I don’t know. He would talk to you and he and I would talk a lot, and he would give you advice a lot. Something that would help me.”
She spoke at length about her bilingual education and the opportunities it eventually brought her.
“So, elementary school I started 7-years-old, 6-years-old and I started studying English, basic English. And all throughout elementary school I was in school that is named Dos Naciones Unidas (Two United Nations). My mom would take us all there, and then after that I had to go to middle school, another school. It was a school named Pan American Workshop.
I studied there until two years or a year before highschool. And then I went to highschool, and it was bilingual also. Everything was half English and the other half were subjects in Spanish.”
Despite already learning to speak English and Spanish fluently, Leticia’s mother decided that her four children would also learn French.
“My Mom, somehow heard about French classes, so she decided to put us all four into French classes. So she put us into this school that she will take us once a week to take French, which is L’Alliance Francaise de Mexique. So, we were there every week the four of us.”
Leticia and her siblings, having now been equipped with three languages, were fortunate enough to spend time studying abroad at various points in their lives. Leticia, in particular, spent a summer in Minnesota when she was 12-years-old and later a year in France after completing her undergraduate degree.
Her early experiences in the United States played an important role in shaping her understanding of the country. She recalled feeling a deep affinity for the family she stayed with.
“They had three kids. John was my brother’s age. Susan was my age, and they had a little girl named Hadey. The mom was an absolutely wonderful woman. I remember her. She was a nurse, and she was extra nice. I thought all Americans would be like her.”
She recounted fond memories of sharing Dr. Pepper with her homestay mother, Judy, who sat on the porch awaiting her return from camp every day.
Leticia’s memories of her life in Mexico, at times, felt distant. She often referred to it as “mi Mexico” and suggested that the Mexico of today felt unfamiliar to her. At this point, Leticia has lived in the U.S. for over 25 years.
It was in June of 1994, two years after meeting Jon in Acapulco, that she officially decided to leave Mexico City and move to Southern California.
“When you’re young you don’t think about the process of how everything needs to get done. I just moved here with him and was like oh that’s good you know.
I came here and I sent all of my savings to Jon’s account, and I got a job. They couldn’t pay me, because, obviously, I didn’t have papers. But, I got a job in HR.
I have experience and I spoke that language very well in English and I spoke the language very well in my primary language, my first language is Spanish.
So, I got a job. I agreed with the director that they wouldn’t pay me until I got my paperwork. And, then we deal with a lawyer to get a Visa.”
Despite establishing a wedding date far in the future, complications with an almost expired multi-entrance visa led to an impromptu Vegas Wedding that neither Leticia or Jon’s family can ever know about.
“We gave money to the lawyer and they said it’s too complicated. And, then after we paid he said if you guys are planning on getting married, just get married. So, we did. And, we had to go, because my multiple entrance Visa had expired, and so I had to go to Las Vegas with your dad, and we decided to get married, even though we had already set a date for our wedding, which was planned for April 1st. Fools Day, which is funny…”
To this day, Jon regrets not having had Elvis Presley officiate it. After officially marrying Jon, Leticia had no plans to become a U.S. citizen. It wasn’t until 2007, 10 years after their marriage, that Leticia considered naturalizing.
Jon had just been diagnosed with breast cancer, and his parents strongly urged Leticia to make preparations to stay in the U.S. indefinitely should something happen.
“I wasn’t thinking about becoming a citizen, because I’m a Mexican citizen. But because of you two, I really needed to think about becoming one, because as an immigrant they’re gonna take me away from you.”
Speaking about her in-laws brought tears to her eyes. She talked about the influential role they played in creating a U.S. that she was proud to live in.
“I met my father-in-law. He was an amazing man. And, I was proud of it. It’s a good decision for my kids to be in this country. People are so nice.”
It is in these brief quotations that it became clear how much of Leticia’s story was guided and motivated by love: her love for her husband, her children, her in-laws, and the love that they returned. But, of course, love is never without pain.
While she tried to avoid talking about it, she briefly mentioned the struggles and isolation she had experienced as a mother in the U.S., recounting stories of white parents who would only talk to her if she was with her white American husband or white American children.
She found comfort in a group of other immigrant mothers, however, who helped buffer against the cruel judgments and assumptions she faced at her children’s predominantly White prep school.
“Taiko and Sumiko were great. They are immigrants. Marta was an immigrant. I can’t be friends with the other moms because they don’t accept me. Sandra likes me, but we can’t get along because we don’t have anything in common. And, your dad gets affected also for that.”
Jon, similarly, continued to be a buffer against whatever harsh realities the world threw at her.
“When I decided to come here for love, I said fuck it and I moved her. And, at that point and that time, I decided what my life would be. Doesn’t matter if I fit or don’t fit here, as long as I’m with him. He’s my family. I decided that when I was 27 and I moved here. We made our world, and that for me is home.”
She repeatedly emphasized the importance of the “world” that she and her husband had created– a loving sanctuary, a break from the judgments of those who don’t understand, a space where she feels like she truly belongs and is proud of the United States, a home, her home.